Well, I wonder how many people I actually have reading this thing since I h
ave basically dropped off the planet. It has been such a whirlwind this last month. I have had so many emotions and decisions and choices that I haven't really known one thing to blog about so I didn't blog about anything, and I should have at least said hi, and let you all know I'm OK. I need to keep this up much better if only to say hi. So I will try my darnedest to blog on here each week.
I guess I could start with my grandfathers funeral. I've had so many emotions over this one, that I still am having bouts of sadness. I know he is where he should be and wants to be, and is doing a marvelous work, but I cant stop feeling jipped somehow. I went along with this Pharmacy school stuff knowing that We would apply to the U of U only, and keep tying till we got in so that we could stay close to family, and so I could stay close to my Grandparents whom my children got to see and play with on a weekly basis. It was our tradition to go to some of the thrift stores on Saturdays and then swing by to visit Grandma and Grandpa. Those times I will always treasure. But when Will went to the Dean of Pharmacy and showed her his grades and asked what else he needed to do she politely told him, and they had a great conversation, all up until the end when she did the most stupidest thing ever and that was to make a snide comment about Mormon's, which then led him to tell her he was Mormon, and then she instantly became cold and distant and wouldn't answer anymore of his questions. After that he had a bad feeling about the U of U, and then a week later when a very dear friend of ours interviewed with that same person for a spot in the Pharmacy department was made fun of due to his being a Mormon, and then didn't get in, even though he had better grades (a 3.8gpa) and better PCAT scores and other items than his cousin who also applied to the U of U program who had fallen away from the LDS church and who happened to have a MUCH lower GPA and a lower PCAT score and NO VOLUNTEER work in the field at all, and his cousin got in..not even wait listed, just straight in. This to us stated that no matter what if we were to stay LDS we would definitely not be going to the U of U in the Pharmacy department. I was mortified, I wanted to stay in Utah, I didn't want to move away. SO I relented and we applied to other programs with the promise made to me that we would come back to Utah to practice after school was done. So I bid my time, and No offers were made from Utah. Not one!! I then reluctantly decided to go wherever my husband decided to go. I knew I was definitely never going to go to Alaska where he was offered a position with Fred Meyer. And a few of the other choices did not really seem to fit us or what we wanted. All the while I was missing out on time I wanted to spend with my Grandparents. All these years I could never get back. I have a great life now, please don't misunderstand me, but this is why I feel a little jipped. I never got back to Utah as often as I wanted to, and I never got to spend the time I wanted to with my Grandfather. My children didn't get to spend much time with him either. Luckily all of them remember him, and have fond memories of visiting them on a weekly basis. I am so thankful that I insisted on going and visiting once a week without fail. I grew to love and adore my Grandfather and my Grandmother much more than I ever had. I just wish I had more time now that I have the time and money to return to Utah. So to talk about my feelings about my Grandfather right now, are still very tender.
Then there is my parents. I love my parents to death, and look up to their examples. But I am really going to miss them. I know that we can email, and I know that we can video chat, but to think they are in a foreign land where the laws and rules are NOT like ours, and where they are outside of our "freedom" boundaries. I can't help but worry, and feel just a little fear. I know that Heavenly Father will watch out for them, and that they are helping to further the Lords work, but I still am human and have those fears. Funny how about 15 years ago I wouldn't have cared less, but now I care very deeply about what happens to them. How much time has changed me and how much I have grown up. I am going to miss being able to just pick up the phone and hear my mom on the other end and just chat about anything and everything. Or just call her up to ask her one of my "stupid and random" questions. Thank goodness for technology. I'm sure the next 18 months will fly by.
Then there is the decision that Will and I have made to have more children. Yes you read it correctly, more children. We both feel as though our family is not done, and after much prayer and fasting, and trips ( LONG 379 mile long trips) to the temple, we feel that we have more waiting, and will be richly blessed and even "happier than we are now, or ever could be" according to a confirmation, if we have more children. I will be having surgery to undo my sterilization that I had all those years ago before I had lost over 200lbs, and when I had many many health problems that would leave me childless, or even worse my family motherless. But now that those health issues have been resolved, and I have lost a significant amount of weight, I have been to the Dr's and have been cleared for babies again. Funny though that my OBGYN is in my ward. We live in a very SMALL town, and he is one of the best high risk Dr's there are here in Yuma and in Phoenix, and Tuscon....he comes recommended from far away. So that's great, and he comes recommended from many of my close friends here in the ward as well. So... sometime after July 2th we will start to try to expand our family, so look for more in that area as we know anything. SO that has taken a lot of my time and my feelings for that as well this month, and finally...
(as if that wasn't enough)
We spent a wonderful week with my parents and Wills parents. We decided as a small thank you for them supporting us through school we would treat them to Disneyland. So we took them, and had a marvelous time. I will post some pics soon, but I will post my most favorite photos of all of them right now so you can see just how much fun we had. I will post more about Disneyland later. Right now it is late and I am exhausted. We have been moving tons, and I mean tons...5 tons to be exact of rock all over our backyard, and 1.5 tons of sand into a sandbox we built for the kids. We are fixing up our backyard, and so I will post pics of that soon as well. Sheesh, so many pics to post and not enough time. So here you go, and I promise it wont be this long in between writings again.
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| I absolutely LOVE my mothers hair here!!! |
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| I LOVE the smiles on these two faces. Made it worth it. |
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| Funny Funny People, whom I love dearly. |
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| My view of California adventures while we waited for the "World of Color" show to start. |
